I can't sleep. I have no idea why, as I feel ridiculously tired and my bed is really really comfortable. I even called my boyfriend hoping he would come over because I usually fall asleep when he is around. Puke - how icky is that? Oh well.
Anyways, I put my head down on my uber-soft pillow, ready for a long winters nap but my brain WILL NOT SHUT OFF. And for some reason I start thinking about my dog who passed away earlier this year. Her name was Molly and she was a white fluffy dog with long legs. She resembled a muppet. I got her when I was 11, or was it 12? I think it was 12. Anyways, she clearly has been in my life for a really long time and I really really really miss her. How is it possible to miss an animal almost, if not more, than some human beings? Only non-pet people will not understand.
Dogs (or any pet I suppose) are great. Dogs are cute. They do funny things like spoon with you or sit on your lap when you are driving and they clearly need a cuddle. They are there when you are sad (or can't sleep) and are always happy. Their tails will tell you what kind of mood they are in (usually happy) and they are smart. Well sometimes, I have met a few cocker spaniels who are not smart. My dog was smart.
The last time I saw Molly was after Christmas. She was curled up in the backseat of my parent's car on her blanket. As they dropped me off at the airport I made sure to cuddle her one last time and bury by face in her fluffy whiteness and kiss her head. She barely acknowledged me, poor old lady.
Anyways, if you have ever thought about having a pet you really should get one. People who grew up without pets missed out on something great (my bf is one of these - he had no idea what to say when I was weeping over my dead dog.) Therefore, I urge you to go buy a dog. They rock, even though their paw print on your life is brief . . . .
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Ease
I thrive on change. I really do. There are things where I love consistency, like good coffee at my favorite cafe, knowing that my favorite movies will make me laugh or cry, and waking up in the morning to know that I won't have a huge blemish somewhere on my face--these things, I like to know what's coming. But with work, travel, the people you meet the people you see, I must say I love the variety. But I am having, more often than not, these days where I have an epiphany, and something will suddenly make sense and make me realize why I am feeling the way I feel.
First off, I'm surprised how the past few days I am not stressing over the things that I have no control over. You know how they say the more you worry about money the less you have? It may be one of the teachings of "The Secret," but I have finally put that to work. I'm not used to 'not worrying.' In fact, those two words do not go together in my mind. Work is another one of those "Hey, don't worry--it will all fall into place" things. Funny, I have absolutely no problem saying that to my friends and believing it on their behalf. When friends come to me with worries, I really think all will be well and do not give it another thought. What if I apply this to myself?
I like my job. Well, the work I do I like. I like the people I work with. But.....what can I say? I double guess myself, do not get paid much, and find myself coasting and having a hard time focusing. Then I rationalize it by saying, well, I do not get paid much. I know that this is felt at work--sometimes it is very hard to hide your energy. And it is scary to think the work I decided I wanted to do is not fulfilling me the way I want. Is it the work? Is it me? Is it the environment? Am I a lazy bag? Or am I just beating myself up? One thing I have discovered is that your job, a job that you truly love, even if it may be stressful at times or high paced, should have some ease in it. Work and ease? Yup. At this point, I am willing to do something completely different. I have to admit I want to change my line of work for more money, but I am okay with that. I just want to find that ease.
I like the change. I have decided to embark on a new city overseas. A new environment. A new job. A new life. Everything will be different and new, from the way the money will look in my wallet to the way people speak and the side of the street they drive on. Instead of filling me will fear it gives me a sense of ease. There is something lovely about the notion of leaving one world behind to enter another. If one world is not working for you, even if you gave it a good shot, then go to the next world. I gave it a good shot here, and want to see how I'll work in another environment.
I the meantime...I look forward to finding out what what will fit in the suitcase and where that suitcase will end up.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Only Popping in for a Moment...
I've disappeared for most of the month while dedicating myself to my National Novel Writing Month challenge. I should probably have kept more careful track of the ups and downs (there have been an abundance of both!) but I rather suspect writing a book is like having a baby--for a long time you get big and fat and unwieldy and uncomfortable. Then you have the insane pain of giving birth. But after it's all over and you're holding that baby (or novel) in your arms, you completely forget all those times in the past year (nine months, whatever) where you said "I AM NEVER DOING THIS AGAIN" and you just think Oh, this is the best feeling in the WORLD!
Writing books is fun, but it is also stressful. It involves this strange blend of cockiness ('Well, of course someone will want to read this! It's brilliant!') and humility ('Will someone want to read this? Do I want to read this?')
In this blog entry, however, I want to share my new favourite thing: the magical ten-minute power-write. The magical ten-minute power-write has changed my life! I'm not kidding. Ten minutes--it's practically nothing. It's a third of a sitcom. Hell, it's the amount of time you spend watching commercials during a sitcom! (Give or take a minute or two.) My point is, everyone has ten minutes here and there. So, in order to plow through the last 10000 words of my 50000 word challenge, I knew I was going to do something drastic. Meandering through my day writing ten words here and there was not going to cut it. So I set the alarm on my cell phone for ten minutes, put my fingers to the keyboard, and did not allow myself to stop typing until the phone beeped at me.
First time out: 424 words. Followed by a second ten minutes: 440 words. Then 400, 477, 439, 404, 483, 505, 486 and 482.
That's right, my friends. 100 minutes and 4140 words. If you wrote an average of 450 words in ten minutes, and only spent ten minutes A DAY (do you realize how many ten minute blocks are in a day??!!) writing... you'd have an 80,000 word novel in less than six months. Imagine what you could do if you spent three ten minute blocks writing every day. Or six. Or ten. That's right, just imagine it. And that, my friends, is the magical ten-minute power-write.
Hey... you got ten minutes?
Writing books is fun, but it is also stressful. It involves this strange blend of cockiness ('Well, of course someone will want to read this! It's brilliant!') and humility ('Will someone want to read this? Do I want to read this?')
In this blog entry, however, I want to share my new favourite thing: the magical ten-minute power-write. The magical ten-minute power-write has changed my life! I'm not kidding. Ten minutes--it's practically nothing. It's a third of a sitcom. Hell, it's the amount of time you spend watching commercials during a sitcom! (Give or take a minute or two.) My point is, everyone has ten minutes here and there. So, in order to plow through the last 10000 words of my 50000 word challenge, I knew I was going to do something drastic. Meandering through my day writing ten words here and there was not going to cut it. So I set the alarm on my cell phone for ten minutes, put my fingers to the keyboard, and did not allow myself to stop typing until the phone beeped at me.
First time out: 424 words. Followed by a second ten minutes: 440 words. Then 400, 477, 439, 404, 483, 505, 486 and 482.
That's right, my friends. 100 minutes and 4140 words. If you wrote an average of 450 words in ten minutes, and only spent ten minutes A DAY (do you realize how many ten minute blocks are in a day??!!) writing... you'd have an 80,000 word novel in less than six months. Imagine what you could do if you spent three ten minute blocks writing every day. Or six. Or ten. That's right, just imagine it. And that, my friends, is the magical ten-minute power-write.
Hey... you got ten minutes?
Snow please Snow!!
Yesterday snow fell on the north side of me, the east side of me, west of me and the south side of me. But not on me!!!! While the news showed idiot British Columbians who are terrified of snow talk about the traffic travesty I was deeply saddened that the weather outside my door was not frightful. I love snow!!! I am from the prairies where it SNOWS. And at this time of year I can't help but crave the fluffy white stuff.
When it is snowing outside, you get to cozy up in fluffy PJ's and slippers, the fire blazing (that's right, I turn my fire switch to ON), tea in a steaming mug, and a good book. Or a boyfriend. Or a movie. Or some pizza. Whatever, as long as you are inside. Watching the snow gently fall creating a soft light and a certain quietness on the city. You can snuggle and listen to Christmas carols. I just love snow.
My prairie family says about rain 'well at least you don't have to shovel it.' But this is no consolation as I live in a condo and don't shovel. Also, this city shuts down for a few days - no one goes to work but they play outside like kids after a blizzard. I remember one year it snowed after Christmas and the parks were full of snowmen and grown adults having snowball fights. I really really love snow.
The mountains were all glorious and glistening today under the crisp (and unusual) sunlight. I saw some cars with snow on their roofs and felt quite jealous. I have underground parking so I no longer have to scrape snow off my car.
Maybe the key to loving snow is living in a city that rarely gets it, and when they do everyone plays. The roads are shut down and everyone is forced to relax. I don't have to shovel nor do I have to scrape ice off of my car. And we also have the happy knowledge that the snow is temporary and that -30 weather is not right behind it. Maybe I have forgotten the five months of snow that seemed to drag forever. Nope. I even miss that crunch of snow underfoot you only get in really cold places when snow falls on snow falls on snow.
I can't say it enough: I LOVE SNOW!!
When it is snowing outside, you get to cozy up in fluffy PJ's and slippers, the fire blazing (that's right, I turn my fire switch to ON), tea in a steaming mug, and a good book. Or a boyfriend. Or a movie. Or some pizza. Whatever, as long as you are inside. Watching the snow gently fall creating a soft light and a certain quietness on the city. You can snuggle and listen to Christmas carols. I just love snow.
My prairie family says about rain 'well at least you don't have to shovel it.' But this is no consolation as I live in a condo and don't shovel. Also, this city shuts down for a few days - no one goes to work but they play outside like kids after a blizzard. I remember one year it snowed after Christmas and the parks were full of snowmen and grown adults having snowball fights. I really really love snow.
The mountains were all glorious and glistening today under the crisp (and unusual) sunlight. I saw some cars with snow on their roofs and felt quite jealous. I have underground parking so I no longer have to scrape snow off my car.
Maybe the key to loving snow is living in a city that rarely gets it, and when they do everyone plays. The roads are shut down and everyone is forced to relax. I don't have to shovel nor do I have to scrape ice off of my car. And we also have the happy knowledge that the snow is temporary and that -30 weather is not right behind it. Maybe I have forgotten the five months of snow that seemed to drag forever. Nope. I even miss that crunch of snow underfoot you only get in really cold places when snow falls on snow falls on snow.
I can't say it enough: I LOVE SNOW!!
Thursday, November 8, 2007
I Thought I'd Miss My Television More
Hours spent scrolling through channels all playing The Simpsons, Oprah, King of the Hill, American Idol, America's Next Top Model. Hours spent watching reruns of television shows I'd seen two, three, even four times (in the case of most Simpsons episodes) before. Hours spent not reading, not writing, not going for walks, not spending quality time with my husband or my friends. Oh, television, you ever-so-demanding mistress.
When we moved to New York, the television didn't come with us, and it wasn't a high priority item on the must-replace-or-I-will-die list (unlike the bed, say, or chairs.) We've been here almost three months now, and I've read more books than I can name, I've dedicated myself to writing, I've spent a great deal of time with my husband. (Still no word on the friends front, but eventually I imagine I'll make some. Hopefully.) Now, I'll be the first to admit I haven't quit TV cold turkey. One of the Internet perks in the USA is the existence of streaming video. I've learned I don't need to be at home, planted in front of my television, waiting with baited breath to hear what sarcastic witticisms Dr. House will spew before miraculously solving yet another mysterious illness. In fact, waiting until the next day (or even two or three days later! Heaven forfend!) to catch up with my television shows causes very little discomfort at all.
I was going to use this forum to comment about the Writers Guild of America strike, but honestly, I'm not sure I'm aware enough of both sides of the story. I am, however, aware enough to know that many, many of the individuals spouting off on the Internet about the strike ought to keep their mouths shut until they get caught up with all sides of the issue.
That said, it's important to note that unions still exist for a reason (antiquated or not) and an entire union doesn't choose to strike in order to cause harm and distress to others affected (in this case I mean the teamsters, actors, and assorted behind-the-scenes staff who are or will be out of a job if and when the stockpiled scripts dry up---not the person sitting at home jonesing for a new episode of their favourite sitcom)---a regular layperson spouting off about the greed of the ever-so-rich writers of Hollywood needs to...well, they need to stop, read some statistics about just how many members of the WGA are working at a given time, and just how much the median members of the WGA bring home in a year.
The WGA isn't striking to piss you off, random television viewer. They're striking because they feel let down and betrayed by the system they work for. Read up on it. Then come back and try to have a civilized conversation. Ranting, raving and frothing at the mouth about the wealthy Hollywood sons-of-bitches who are denying you your weekly Heroes fix isn't helpful, it isn't interesting and it isn't even accurate.
Until then? Read a book. I bet you'll find quite a few in your local library. Some of them are even as good as TV shows, no kidding! Go for a walk. Play Monopoly with your family. Take it from me--the world keeps on turning, even without weekly doses of Prison Break.
When we moved to New York, the television didn't come with us, and it wasn't a high priority item on the must-replace-or-I-will-die list (unlike the bed, say, or chairs.) We've been here almost three months now, and I've read more books than I can name, I've dedicated myself to writing, I've spent a great deal of time with my husband. (Still no word on the friends front, but eventually I imagine I'll make some. Hopefully.) Now, I'll be the first to admit I haven't quit TV cold turkey. One of the Internet perks in the USA is the existence of streaming video. I've learned I don't need to be at home, planted in front of my television, waiting with baited breath to hear what sarcastic witticisms Dr. House will spew before miraculously solving yet another mysterious illness. In fact, waiting until the next day (or even two or three days later! Heaven forfend!) to catch up with my television shows causes very little discomfort at all.
I was going to use this forum to comment about the Writers Guild of America strike, but honestly, I'm not sure I'm aware enough of both sides of the story. I am, however, aware enough to know that many, many of the individuals spouting off on the Internet about the strike ought to keep their mouths shut until they get caught up with all sides of the issue.
That said, it's important to note that unions still exist for a reason (antiquated or not) and an entire union doesn't choose to strike in order to cause harm and distress to others affected (in this case I mean the teamsters, actors, and assorted behind-the-scenes staff who are or will be out of a job if and when the stockpiled scripts dry up---not the person sitting at home jonesing for a new episode of their favourite sitcom)---a regular layperson spouting off about the greed of the ever-so-rich writers of Hollywood needs to...well, they need to stop, read some statistics about just how many members of the WGA are working at a given time, and just how much the median members of the WGA bring home in a year.
The WGA isn't striking to piss you off, random television viewer. They're striking because they feel let down and betrayed by the system they work for. Read up on it. Then come back and try to have a civilized conversation. Ranting, raving and frothing at the mouth about the wealthy Hollywood sons-of-bitches who are denying you your weekly Heroes fix isn't helpful, it isn't interesting and it isn't even accurate.
Until then? Read a book. I bet you'll find quite a few in your local library. Some of them are even as good as TV shows, no kidding! Go for a walk. Play Monopoly with your family. Take it from me--the world keeps on turning, even without weekly doses of Prison Break.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Procrastination is an UGLY beast
I have my computer open and raring to go. So what am I doing? Re-organizing my kitchen. I swear I often have the most organized and cleanest house in all the land. I stared at my screen for a while then decided I had nothing to write about so went to clean my kitchen. And being the Virgo that I am, once I start, I just can't stop!!!!! Double GAH! At this rate I will have to go to Ikea to buy all new furniture to deal with my newly organized kitchen and office and bedroom. Speaking of which, I need a desk. GAH!
But when I am writing I LOVE LOVE LOVE it - what is wrong with me? Why can't I just go straight to my computer? Good things happen when you do. For instance, I have been writing and developing a TV series for what seems like an eternity. In my mind I knew the computer was calling me, saying "write the character breakdowns, write the character breakdowns". It said this to me for about two months before I actually did. And you know what happened as soon as I finished this last piece of the puzzle? I got two major parties interested in reading the freaking script!!!! So clearly good things happen when you break past that procrastination elf on your shoulder and WRITE.
Okay, back to my kitchen. The knowledge that pots are sitting on my floor is driving me INSANE!
But when I am writing I LOVE LOVE LOVE it - what is wrong with me? Why can't I just go straight to my computer? Good things happen when you do. For instance, I have been writing and developing a TV series for what seems like an eternity. In my mind I knew the computer was calling me, saying "write the character breakdowns, write the character breakdowns". It said this to me for about two months before I actually did. And you know what happened as soon as I finished this last piece of the puzzle? I got two major parties interested in reading the freaking script!!!! So clearly good things happen when you break past that procrastination elf on your shoulder and WRITE.
Okay, back to my kitchen. The knowledge that pots are sitting on my floor is driving me INSANE!
Saturday, November 3, 2007
Even More Fun...
...than I thought it would be.
There is something truly freeing and gratifying about just writing for the sake of getting words on the page. Yes, realistically I know these are not the best words I've ever written. Yes, I can already imagine the great chunks that will eventually disappear beneath the wrath of my red pen. Yes, I am catching myself repeating words or phrases in the sheer rush of adrenaline necessary to get words out. It's a little sloppy, frankly. And I don't care.
I am writing. I am two and a half days, and nearly seven thousand words, into National Novel Writing Month which, for those playing the 1667 words-a-day home game, means I am more than a day ahead of schedule! The story is coming along steadily, the characters are starting to speak and unexpected things are starting to take shape.
Ahh, you beautiful, terrific rush of creativity. I missed you. Please don't go away on such a long vacation again.
6835 / 50000 words. 14% done!
There is something truly freeing and gratifying about just writing for the sake of getting words on the page. Yes, realistically I know these are not the best words I've ever written. Yes, I can already imagine the great chunks that will eventually disappear beneath the wrath of my red pen. Yes, I am catching myself repeating words or phrases in the sheer rush of adrenaline necessary to get words out. It's a little sloppy, frankly. And I don't care.
I am writing. I am two and a half days, and nearly seven thousand words, into National Novel Writing Month which, for those playing the 1667 words-a-day home game, means I am more than a day ahead of schedule! The story is coming along steadily, the characters are starting to speak and unexpected things are starting to take shape.
Ahh, you beautiful, terrific rush of creativity. I missed you. Please don't go away on such a long vacation again.
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